Most of us are still struggling to fully grasp the concept of friends with benefits and we obviously didn’t expect the dating scene to get more complicated than that but apparently, it can and it already has. The millennials have coined something else called a “situationship” and it’s even more confusing than friends with benefits.
If you are not a millennial, you may not have heard of this term yet, but just because you’ve not heard about it doesn’t mean that you are not in one.
Here is everything you need to know about situationships, from what it means, the difference between situationships and relationships, situationships and friends with benefits, as well as the red flags in situationships that you should watch out for.
What Is A Situationship?
A situationship can loosely be defined as a romantic relationship that is undefined or not labelled. It’s where two people are more than friends and are even physically intimate but are not really in a committed relationship and they don’t impose any expectations on each other.
Situationships can be short-term or long-term and although it mostly stems from a fear of commitment, some people might choose to be in a situationship out of a desire for emotional or physical intimacy without the expectations and obligations of a traditional relationship.
Situationship Vs Relationship.
While both situationships and relationships involve romantic and sexual partnerships, the key distinction is the level of commitment and clarity in the partnership.
Relationships are typically more serious and involve a commitment to each other, whereas situationships are more casual, ambiguous and lack a clear direction of where they’re headed.
Situationship Vs Friends With Benefits.
Both situationships and friends with benefits are casual relationships and although it can be hard to distinguish between the two terms, they are not the same thing.
While situationships can involve physical and emotional attachment without commitment or clarity, friends with benefits on the other hand are strictly physical relationships without emotional attachments.
Situationship Red Flags.
While every relationship is unique and what is considered a red flag varies for different people, situationships can be quite challenging in particular, given that it’s usually not a balanced relationship where both people are on the same page.
Here are a few common red flags in situationships that you might want to watch out for if you are in a situationship but don’t want to be stuck in one.
1. Avoidance Of Labels.
One of the key features of a situationship is that the nature of the relationship is not well defined and while you are more than friends, you can’t really say that you are dating.
If you’ve been going out for several months now but your partner still avoids talking about your relationship status every time you bring it up, it could be a sign that he doesn’t want to have a serious relationship with you. This can be a red flag if you are looking for a real relationship.
2. Your Partner Is Not Exclusive With You.
Since situationships are not clearly defined, it’s common for partners to be engaged in relationships with other people.
If you’ve cut ties with other potential dates and are ready to fully commit to your relationship but your partner is still dating other people, then perhaps you need to re-evaluate your relationship.
3. No Consistency In The Relationship.
Another sign that you might be in a situationship is if your relationship lacks the consistency that real relationships have and you and your partner are on and off all the time.
Do you sometimes talk all the time and even regularly meet then out of nowhere you ghost each other for three weeks? You are probably in a situationship and if you don’t want to be in one, then you should start packing.
4. No Plans For The Future.
The thing with most situationships is that they’re usually all about living for the present without much stress about where you two are headed.
If you are at a point where you want a long-term relationship but your partner is not ready to make future plans with you, he probably doesn’t see a future with you and is comfortable with your current situation for as long as it lasts and he’s unlikely to change his opinion.
Another red flag that could indicate that your partner is not looking for a long-term relationship with you is if he is always making last-minute plans with you. This could mean that he is only treating you as a last option when he doesn’t have anything else to do.
5. Unbalanced Effort.
Most situationships are one-sided and in most cases, one partner is often more invested in the relationship than the other partner.
If you feel like you are doing all the work to maintain the relationship and your partner is not making enough effort, it can be a sign that the relationship is not balanced and it’s an unhealthy relationship.
Rules Of A Situationship.
If you find yourself in a situationship and want to make the best out of it, here are a few rules that can help you enjoy your situationship without getting hurt.
- Keep your feelings in check and try not to fall hard.
- Set up and observe boundaries. Decide what you can do and what you can’t with your partner.
- Keep it light and avoid becoming too invested.
- Keep your options open and always evaluate your situationship.
- Don’t forget that it’s a temporary situation.