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There are a lot of things to feel guilty for and a lot of things not to feel guilty for, yet we often find ourselves carrying the weight of the things that are okay to do.
It is okay to feel guilty for wasting opportunities that could have made your life better, or for hurting another person knowingly but it isn’t okay to feel guilty for things that are human to do. It is also not okay to feel guilty about things beyond your control. You have to be able to see yourself as a human being with limits and accept your humanness.
Here are a few things we shouldn’t feel guilty about.
Eating.
People, especially women, have a complicated relationship with food. Thinness was the standard for a long time and even though we have fought against that, the fashion world is as relentless as we are.
Bikini bodies are a thing now and every piece of cloth sold on Instagram shops demands a thin waist. There are a lot of other fashion brands that are invested in inclusivity but never get as much traction as the ones that make clothes that appeal to the male gaze. They stay hidden by the algorithm while women struggle to keep up with the thin waists that fast fashion demands.
This toxic culture has affected the relationship we have with food. We are always dieting and counting calories and I just want to say all that is nonsense. It is a prison you shouldn’t lock yourself in. Your body is perfect, and you shouldn’t punish it because a social media algorithm chooses what to give visibility to.
Never feel guilty for enjoying your food. You can always get a bigger dress.
Crying.
There are emotions such as laughter that are acceptable and then there are emotions such as crying that are associated with shame. Even as children, you could be laughed at for being a crybaby but no one ever received any shame for being a joyous baby.
What the world around us forgets is that all these different emotions are what make us truly human. Without them, we could only be robots.
It is okay to cry. You are allowed to feel your emotions as authentically as you can and you should never feel guilty about it. The guilt belongs to those who feel there’s something wrong with expressing an emotion that is deeply ingrained in all of us.
Being Single.
The pressure to be coupled is insane. Relationships are so chaotic and yet we can’t stop seeing people as failures for not being in them. That is how absurd society is and there’s nothing we can do about it. The only thing that is within your power as a person, is your ability to refuse the shame society imposes on you for simply being normal.
It is okay to desire a relationship but you must remember that not being in one isn’t something to feel guilty for. You are whole as a person and you do not need someone else to complete you.
Relationships only come to bring you a sense of community in your life. They are not a mark for success, nor a mark for failure.
Not Drinking Alcohol.
I do not know when alcohol became a social glue. We just woke up one day and all social events and situations were never complete without a drink or a cocktail in hand.
It is normal to feel left out when everyone in your social circles enjoys a little bit of hard liquor. I know how insanely weird it is when you get to a table or an office party and realize you are the only person who doesn’t have a drink in tow. While taking juice on social occasions is almost unheard of at this point in our lives, it isn’t something to feel guilty for. Your choice is as valid as the next person who is drinking.
Yours is just an unpopular choice and you should never feel guilty for taking a different stand from the rest of the world. Just have your mocktail and thank God you will never have to go through a hangover in your life.
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